Wednesday, December 16, 2009

The Connected Adolescent

Wow, has it really been that long since I've shared my thoughts online?! Maybe it's been the 300,000 miles on airplanes this year or the continuous mad scramble to keep business flowing in this unprecedented economy.There certainly hasn't been any lack of conversational topics, though...

It's almost a cliche' anymore to point out the ways that the internet and information age has changed our life and how we interact. Early last year, I referenced Sean Tevis' indoctrination into political activism. I still remember the day he walked into my office relaying to me how he had been encouraged to launch a campaign for Kansas State Representative, Michelle had suggested that he solicit my view on the matter. With no funds and no political background running against the incumbent retired police chief in a strongly conservative Republican district, it seemed a bit of senseless folly, and with their first child on the way....perhaps Michelle expected me to talk him out of the idea (I never went back and asked her, she intimidates me too much). Not knowing at the time that I would be moving to Oregon in less than 2 months, I told him he would be a fool not to run, and that, as the underdog, he should turn this into a new media campaign ("go with what you know" I told my favorite web developer and blogger). Remember what happened earlier this year in Malaysia, right? (actually, most people in Kansas had not paid much attention to the political revolution in Malaysia earlier that year, so the reference was somewhat lost). Well, the rest, as they say, is history. Gaining national media attention for his web-based fund raising efforts, Sean made this laugher of a race incredibly close. It was Balboa-Creed I. It was so frightening for the establishment, that they introduced the "Sean Tevis Bill" right after the election, attempting to make sure that these new media activists can't threaten to upset the balance of power ever again (good luck with that one, I guess)....

Closer to home, though, I have entered that magical phase of fatherhood known as adolescence and puberty. Probably high on the conscious mind of any parent (and child) at this stage is social development. I have noted a trend in my own social interactions over the last 5 years. With the explosion of social media and constant connectivity, I find myself continuously connected with hundreds of friends and colleagues, even from the far corners of the earth. If I need professional advice on a marketing campaign, I can instantly ping 385 of my friends and coworkers on LinkedIn, if they each forward it to a friend of a friend, it reaches a network of over 4,177,000 people! On Facebook, I'll post albums from our hockey teams, instantly notifying 225 friends and family of Tyler's game-winning goal.

So, the dilemma; at what point should a 12-year old kid be allowed to socialize online? Being the progressive parent, I decided to set up a profile for him. As it turns out, facebook requires users to be 18years old to have an account. Poking around, though, a noticed several of Tyler's classmates' profiles. After a conversation with my wife and establishment of a very strict set of house rules and requirements, we turned our 12 y/o loose on facebook. Guess I'm not the only parent choosing to overlook the minimum age requirements - less than 3 weeks later, he has a network of over 100 online friends and classmates. It struck me that, unlike those in my generation, my sons will likely not find themselves with "long lost friends". Remember when your best friend moved away after 3rd grade? Sure, you traded post cards time and again, maybe a phone call when his family passed through town (oh, the days of interstate toll calls...). But, by high school he was little more than a memory and the occasional "I wonder what ever happened to Bill Coffer?"

What about that random encounter? The "visiting from out of town - friend of a friend" you met at the Halloween party? Unless you made considerable effort, developing and maintaining a long distance friendship was a rare occurrence. Not today. Meet someone who you'll only see twice a year? Not a problem, link up on facebook, follow each other's twitter feeds and become life-long friends...

But I wonder - do we spend so much time online connecting remotely with the masses, that we will develop less deep relationships to the few closest to us? Hard to tell, really, as I sit in my easy chair receiving Farmville gifts from my wife, who is lounging on the sofa next to me, also working on her laptop. "Hey Ty," I yell to my 12 year old in the next room, "I need more chickens for my coop." "No problem, dad, I'll send you one." Such is life on the family farm....

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